Private Equity EST. After Daddy’s 2nd Divorce – Vintage Tee
Built on heartbreak, funded by alimony.
The Private Equity Tee is for those who inherited trauma and a condo. This isn’t just a shirt—it’s a tax-sheltered identity. With a retro type treatment that screams “boardroom brat,” this tee plays like old money with a vendetta and an investment portfolio built on spite.
Features:
✔ Luxe-feel vintage cotton – as soft as your prenup clause
✔ Unisex fit – tailored for heirs and erratic behavior
✔ “Private Equity Est. After Daddy’s 2nd Divorce” front graphic – because some empires are born from custody battles
✔ Ideal for networking events, yacht tantrums, and crying at Nobu
For the emotionally unavailable with excellent credit.
| S | M | L | XL | 2XL | 3XL | 4XL | 5XL | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Width, in | 18.00 | 20.00 | 22.00 | 24.00 | 26.00 | 28.00 | 30.00 | 32.00 |
| Length, in | 28.00 | 29.00 | 30.00 | 31.00 | 32.00 | 33.00 | 34.00 | 35.00 |
| Sleeve length (from center back), in | 15.10 | 16.50 | 18.00 | 19.50 | 21.00 | 22.40 | 23.70 | 25.00 |
| Size tolerance, in | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 |
Care instructions
– Non-chlorine: bleach as needed
– Do not iron
– Do not dryclean
– Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)
– Tumble dry: low heat
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